A Minecraft server for your kids: a parent’s guide

Your child wants to play Minecraft with friends from school, but you’d rather they didn’t end up on a big public server full of strangers. A private server is a good solution. You decide who can join, which rules apply and when to stop. This guide walks you through four steps to set it up safely, what it costs and what to look out for as a parent.

Why a private server?

On a public server, anyone who knows the address can join. On a private server with a whitelist, only the players you add can get in. You set the rules: survival or creative building, with or without monsters, and who gets to be an admin. That keeps it a closed space for a fixed group of friends.

What age is Minecraft for?

Mojang’s parents’ guide gives a recommended PEGI rating of 7 and an ESRB rating of Everyone 10+. People of all ages play Minecraft, so look mainly at what suits your child. On a private server you can choose creative building or a world without monsters, and you decide who plays along.

Step 1: turn on multiplayer for your child’s account

Mojang notes that multiplayer is switched off by default on child accounts, for both Java and Bedrock. As a parent, you turn it on yourself:

1. Go to account.xbox.com/settings and sign in with your own parent account.
2. Choose your child’s account.
3. Open Online Safety and set You can join multiplayer games to Allow.

If your child plays on a console, Mojang points out that online play also requires a platform subscription, such as Nintendo Switch Online or PlayStation Plus.

Step 2: friends only

For this you use a whitelist: a list of players who are allowed to join. On Java Edition you switch it on with /whitelist on and add players with /whitelist add name. Since Minecraft 26.3 the whitelist is even switched on by default on new servers. In the game panel you’ll also find Players under the Minecraft section, where you manage the whitelist, admins and bans without typing commands.

On Bedrock it’s called an allowlist. Set allow-list=true in server.properties and add players with /allowlist add name.

On Java, also leave online-mode set to true, as it is by default. That way only players with a genuine Minecraft account can connect. According to the Minecraft Wiki, someone with a fake account can get in when that setting is off.

Step 3: rules and permissions

Only give operator rights (op) to yourself or to someone you trust. An operator can kick players, change the time and give themselves anything. You set the game mode and difficulty in server.properties, for example creative building for younger children and survival for older ones.

If something does go wrong, say someone wrecks a build, you have your backups. If you want to see exactly who did what and roll it back, a plugin such as CoreProtect is a popular choice on Paper servers.

Step 4: chat and reporting

Java Edition has had a reporting tool for inappropriate chat messages since version 1.19.1. According to Mojang, it works on multiplayer servers of every size, private ones included. On Bedrock, players can mute, block or report others from the pause menu. Show your child how this works, and agree that they’ll tell you straight away if something unpleasant happens.

Agree on playtimes, and automate them

Don’t want any playing after bedtime? With Schedules in the game panel you can stop and start the server at set times, for example off at half past eight and back on after school. You create a schedule with the Send power action task. That way you don’t have to remember, and the rules are clear for the whole group.

It also helps to agree on a few rules together: who can build where, and what happens if someone wrecks something? A small sign with the rules at spawn helps young players keep things friendly.

Costs and payment

Order the server in your own name, so you receive the invoices and you’re the one who can cancel. You pay monthly in advance, VAT included, through Stripe with methods such as iDEAL, Bancontact, card or PayPal. You cancel in My CakeHosting; the server then keeps running until the end of the month you’ve already paid for.

Want an older child to be able to start the server or add plugins? In the game panel, under Users, you can give an extra user access with only the permissions you choose.

Does your child play on a console?

To be honest: on a Switch, Xbox or PlayStation you can’t simply add your own server in Minecraft. There are workarounds, but they take some technical know-how. If the whole group plays on consoles, Mojang’s Realms is often simpler. If they play on a tablet, phone or computer, you just add your own server to the server list.

Oops, the castle is gone

Make backups a habit. You create one with a single click in the game panel, and you can also schedule them automatically. See Create and restore a backup.